Charlie’s Blog

I just got home from the store where I bought cherries. I couldn’t resist because they were only $2 a pound as opposed to $5 a pound at my other store. What I have learned is that, with cherries at least, you get what you pay for. My expensive Ralph’s cherries were heavenly. These cheapo Henry’s cherries taste like dirt…and I’ve got five fucking pound of them (and nothing else to eat in my house, thank you very much). I hate Henry’s! Oh, and there was an old man in front of the store crushing a big loaf of French bread onto the street for the pigeons. He looked so pleased with himself for being a human bird feeder. I gave him one of my dirtiest looks because I’ve recently been SHIT ON by a pigeon, and I don’t need his geriatric ass making them feel welcome here. Some people need a real hobby or at least a DVR. Seriously why would you spend your time outside giving stale bread to birds when there is so much good TV to watch these days!?

This guy at my job was talking to me yesterday about how he works all the time because he doesn’t have a family or a girlfriend. I wanted to explain that you’re not going to meet a potential girlfriend if you’re working all the time, but, since I didn’t know him, I asked what kind of work he did. He said he was a detective for the DA. Then he said that he works with murderers, rapists, and animal abusers on a very regular basis. Then he told me that I’ve probably met at least one murderer as they are all over the place, and they seem just like you and me. Freaky!

Last night, I had a big test in my tax class. Number one went something like this: "Charlie has an income of $175,500. In the last year, he made charitable contributions of $3,400…" I was like, ha, my name is Charlie. Number two: "Lindsay traded her parcel of land worth $102,000…" and I thought, wow, the pretty redheaded girl I sit next to is named Lindsay (I know, why are all pretty redheads named Lindsay?). Number three: "Scott and Courtney are married and have two dependent children…" Scott and Courtney were all in my class workgroup a few weeks ago. After the test, I asked the professor if he got names from the class roster. He was VERY impressed that I noticed. He didn’t exactly show how impressed he was, but he’s also VERY subtle. Well, I also noticed that half of the class is international and don’t have names like Scott or Courtney, and they were not represented at all on the test. The bigot in me wonders if he didn’t want to have to bother with saying something like "Akiko, who IS a U.S. citizen and resident, earned dividends of…"

This morning, I was looking forward to sleeping in after a hard week, but Brian made me get up at the buttcrack of dawn because his cleaning man was there. After I got over the pain of reliving my childhood trauma of being forced out of the house at 8 AM every Friday of my summer break so that Lupe, the maid from Hell, could come in my room and hide all of my stuff, I came downstairs ready to leave. Then Brian went upstairs for what felt like an hour leaving me alone with his cleaning man. What do you say to a cleaning man?? It was so awkward. I kept trying to think of things to say, but nothing good came to mind ("do you bring your own supplies?"). So instead I picked up a magazine and uncomfortably peroused until it was time to leave.

This entry was posted on Friday, June 23rd, 2006 at 9:22 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.