Charlie’s Blog

You got a really good haircut??? Hopefully it wasn’t too long ago. Anyway, I just got one, and it wasn’t easy. I took a really hard ballet class tonight (my New Year’s Resolution might be to stop taking ballet classes that are out of my reach, by the way), and during the class, as I was face to face with a mirror reflecting the Q-tip of fluff on my head, I vowed to get a good haircut immediately after. It’s a long ride home from the studio, and San Diego has more hair salons per square mile than any other place I’ve seen, so I thought it wouldn’t be hard to find a place. Well, most of the salons were closed (it was 6:15, for crying out loud), and the five that weren’t couldn’t take me. I’d almost made it all the way home when I found a nice-looking salon that was still open. The guy, Donn, said he’d take me, and he was very pleasant. Donn  seemed to understand my hair issues and gave me the elusive hair-that-doesn’t-look-like-it-was-just-cut-haircut (the problem with such a cut is that people don’t even notice that you got one and so you lose that attention!). Now, I’m not saying that he made me runway-ready tonight, but he did do a great job of cleaning up my mop and improving the shape of my head. I’m satisfied. And the price was right, too! I always say, though, ’tis better to pay too much for a haircut, than too little. Feel free to write that on your hand until you know it by heart.

Another wish was granted tonight. My wonderful friend, Brian, offered to take me to Target to buy a space heater for my frigid bedroom (that’s frigid in temperature only, mind you). I’ve been wanting one for so long. I left my old one in New York. I didn’t think I’d need it here, but no one told me that San Diego gets fucking cold at night, especially in the winter. It was 50 this morning which might not seem cold to people in Chicago or the East Coast, but when it’s been nothing but 72 all day, a 20-degree temperature drop stings. The point is, I found a heater for only ten bucks, and now my room is warm and toasty. Unfortunately, space heaters make me sleepy so I’m going to hit the sack now.

I can’t just leave you with two paragraphs about stupid shit like haircuts and space heaters. There must be something more interesting to report. Hmmm…have you heard the new Beyonce song, "Check On It?" It’s my new favorite song even though it has B-side written all over it. Something about it is entrancing to me. Since my ghetto computer doesn’t support iTunes, I had to search for a way to listen online, and I did through aol music. Oh, I’m reading the uber-popular non-fiction "Blink" which mentions a singer named Kenna who is supposed to be incredible despite having failed in all market research tests. Why not google him and give him a listen? I haven’t yet, but I plan to. Maybe tomorrow morning….

since I got up early to go to Frontrunners, the gay running club. I guess I like running okay, but it feels really destructive on my body. Something needs to be done about my fitness level these days, though. I can’t stand going to the gym anymore. I just have no motivation to lift a weight. What can I do?? I’m thinking of joining an outdoor bootcamp workout group. Exercising outdoors is a whole lot more satisfying than in my stuffy gym. Part of me thinks I need to sleep more so that I have the energy to exercise because lately I just want to nap or relax when I’m not at work or running around town.

How was your Thanksgiving? That’s the question of the week! Mine was great! I went to a potluck with some friends from the chorus (shout out to Ben and Michael!), and it was really fun. One guy told captivating stories about exotic travel that I really enjoyed. During the day, I went to see "Rent" which I liked. It wasn’t as awesome as the show, and they took out most of the singing interludes, but it was still good. Of course, it couldn’t compare to the PVHS Show Choir "Rent Medley" which brought the East Bay to its knees back in 1998 (shout out to Sabrina, Tiffany, Michael and Chris!). Don’t worry if you missed it, there is a video floating around.

Now even though I haven’t received any letters, e-mails, or phone calls from readers asking that I post frequent short updates instead of infrequent long ones, I like to think I know what you are thinking. That said, I have decided to commit myself to posting short and often. Enjoy!

As I was turning onto my street today, I smelled a familiar fruit smell in the air. It took me a few seconds to realize that it was guava! Now I always thought guava only grew in the tropics, but I was proven wrong when I followed the scent to a tree full of the fragrant fruit. Now guava is one of those fruits that must be really ripe or else they taste like shit so I was a little unsure about trying it, but I did…and it was good! So good that I’m planning to walk back there with my huge backpack later this afternoon and shake that tree. I met these really nice French people at the potluck, and they just could not stop talking about guava, and I’m starting to understand why. There’s something powerful about it. Those two also told me that they found a macadamia tree in Mission Hills (a nearby neighborhood). Unfortunately, they didn’t remember the address or even the street so no nuts for me.

Yesterday I had round two of work on my teeth. Round one was last Thursday. It seems that at least one of my new fillings needs to be corrected. I bit into a piece of lettuce today, and it nearly knocked me out. The pain persisted for ten or fifteen minutes, too, which let me know that something had to be done. I called the dental office and told them, and the receptionist gave me the impression that this happens pretty frequently. Luckily they were able to squeeze me in tomorrow. I can’t wait to be able to chew!

Last night, I went into a store to get change for the bus, and then the bus went by. By the time I got my change, it was too far ahead to run after it. My bike was parked there so I unlocked it and had a low-speed bus chase. I soon caught up with it at a stop, but it looked like it wouldn’t be stopped long enough for me to lock my bike, so I put the bike on the bus. SD Buses have a thing in the front for bikes, but it’s really tricky to use, and this was only my second time using it. I put my bike in it backwards, and she yelled at me. Then when I got off the bus, I forgot to snap the contraption closed, and she yelled at me again. Then I heard someone comment to her like "whoa, you’re pretty serious about that." And she was like, "that makes me so mad!!" With asshole bus drivers like that, it’s no wonder that everyone (else) in this city drives. She needs a little zen in her life.

Today, I discovered that the local paper has the Jumble in it everyday. I love the Jumble! Ever since A period Journalism 2 in high school (shout out to Christy), I’ve been a Jumble enthusiast. I’ve been working at this job for over a month, reading the paper on my breaks and downtime, and I’m just now finding it. The puns in it are so great, and I learn new words…like winnow. Even though it’s really fun to complete, I always feel dejected when it’s done. It’s not like you get a prize or even a simple "congratulations" from anyone. And then you have to go back to work. I’ve been trying to get into Sudoku. I spent at least an hour on one puzzle today, but it was incredibly frustrating. My co-worker says that one day it just clicks and then it becomes fun, so I shall try again tomorrow.

since I’ve written a post. I did one just the other day. It was really long and newsy and fun, but stupid Friendster deleted it. I think I might have been partly to blame because I took a phone call in the middle of writing it, and I think the website timed out. Ah well, lesson learned. All calls must wait until I hit POST.

Yesterday, as part of my jet set life that just never stops, I went to Palm Springs for just one night (una noche). My friends invited me to come with them to stay at their really good friend’s house and then attend a really big pool party. Well, pool party is my middle name so I jumped at the chance. Now the weather in PS was just gorgeous and perfect for swimming. Silly me, I packed my really cute swimsuit, but forgot to bring shorts or flip-flops. Not wanting to arrive in jeans and shoes and socks, our host dug up some serious hot pants from the seventies (he’s now an old man). Seeing him now, you’d never believe he ever wore them (I’m still doubtful), but he let me borrow them and later gave them to me! They are baby blue with a cream-colored trim. And they fit perfectly, as did a pair of his old flip-flops. Cut to the party. I prance in wearing my short shorts and holding a towel, and all of the five guys in attendence are sitting down, far from the huge, COVERED pool, looking at me like I have two heads. It turned out not to be a pool party. The guy misread the invitation, and we all looked so stupid. I had to explain to each person I talked to why I was dressed so inappropriately (which wasn’t actually hard at all since hardly anyone was there). Guest highlights include a guy with two different colored eyes (one got hit by a bebe as a child and subsequently changed from blue to brown!) and a former TV exec who had inside info on the demise of Arsenio Hall and Jane Pauley.

The best part of the weekend was watching two full hours of my very favorite reality show, Cheaters! Even though it’s not as trashy as it used to be, and I had to watch it at low volume, that show was the bomb. It really makes you think about love and if it really exists. I used to watch it every Saturday night before hitting the clubs back in Chicago until the station stopped airing it. It had been a long time, and watching it now was like a tall glass of water on a hot day in the desert.

The worst part of the weekend was having people speak badly about my body right in front of me. I’m getting fed up with the widespread belief that it is perfectly fine to tell someone that they are too thin. It’s generally agreed that telling someone they need to lose weight is hurtful, but it doesn’t seem that a lot of people understand that it is also hurtful to hear that you need to gain weight. Listen to these insulting and awkward instances! On Friday, a friend of mine slapped me on the back and told me in the middle of the bar that I need some meat on my bones. "Awesome! Well, you have a great weekend, too!" Then this morning, my Palm Springs host told me that I’m "skinnier than a rail" (which doesn’t sound all that great to me) and that I will soon look "emaciated." "Wow! Thanks for telling me that. Excuse me while I rush to the donut shop." Maybe these two guys meant well, but it’s really hard for me to do like Pebbles and give them the benefit of the doubt. I just hope that I don’t explode at the next person.

I’m running out of time, but there’s so much more to report. I’ll give you more highlights from my week. I saw the independent film "Tennis, Anyone" which I don’t recommend unless you really liked "Sideways." I got the new Madonna album which is really good, of course. My favorite song is "Sorry." Oh, and an extra-spicy order of Thai Green Papaya Salad put me in so much discomfort that I have vowed to stay away!

Here’s a little bit about last weekend which was spent dog-sitting. Now dogs are sweet, and this one was especially sweet, but they are such a pain to care for. Someone needs to explain to me why they have to search for a half hour to find the perfect place to take a shit. That was frustrating to me. Next, people should really wait to get a dog until they have a backyard for the dog. It’s just smart. Without that, your entire schedule must revolve around its movements, and that is just no way to live.

I just ate a bunch of dates and bananas at Whole Foods. Dates are so mysterious. I ate a banana then a few dates then another banana. The first banana was delicious and full of flavor while the second one taste like cardboard! It was the dates! That’s okay, though, because the best is to shove both a date and a piece of banana in my mouth and chew them together. You don’t believe me? Try it yourself!

Happy Veterans Day! The worst thing about Veterans Day is that Dear Abby always forgoes giving advice for the day and instead writes a boring column about veterans. Thank God for Miss Manners! Today a man wrote in because his ex-fiancee wouldn’t give back the many pieces of diamond jewelry he had given her. Miss Manners said that a lady never accepts diamonds from anyone but her husband and that, since the ex-fiancee was obviously not a lady, he shouldn’t hold his breath while waiting for her to return them. You know what, I like Miss Manners better than Dear Abby… she really tells people about themselves.

I actually wrote a lengthy blog post last night that was erased by a Friendster malfunction! In it there was a shout out to Phil who came to SD and was nice enough to fix my computer. That’s right… this post is coming live from my bedroom, no more typing the floor of the living room.

Oh, join me in my ebags boycott! Those fools let me order a backpack that wasn’t in stock! They offered me a lame coupon for a different bag, but I’m going to continue to suffer with my current bag.

The weekend is here! I’m hoping to see the Sarah Silverman movie, as well as a gay speaker at the Jewish Book Fair. J*Pride!

I didn’t like Chita’s show. Did you ever see the episode of Seinfeld (shout out to Jean) where Elaine becomes ostracized from society because she hated The English Patient? Well, I liked The English Patient, but I did not like Chita Rivera: A Dancer’s Life which just finished it’s San Diego run before taking to the Broadway stage very soon. I got a free ticket to the final SD show last night through the chorus. While it was awesome to see someone who had such a rich and influential Broadway career, most everything about Chita’s show sucked. And I’m the one who is getting grief about it!

Although I really need to be getting to bed, I won’t be able to sleep until I tell you all why. But, first, let me say that everyone I talked to before seeing the show just raved and raved about it…everyone, that is, but one person, my old dancing buddy and good friend, Trina. Trina told me it sucked. Trina told me that there was very little dancing. On Friday, I told someone that I heard there was very little dancing, and he went around the bar and rounded up three or four witnesses to protest that there was actually quite a bit of dancing. "It was all dancing!" one of them exclaimed. I just remembered Trina’s words, "it’s called A Dancer’s Life, but there’s no dancing!" and gushed about how excited I was to finally get to see it.

A tiny part of me wonders if it was a self-fulfilling prophecy, but Trina was right…there was very little dancing. There was not one complete dance number in the whole show. It was a real shame because the back-up cast was made up of some of the best dancers from Broadway (people from Fosse and the like). One of the girls I recognized from the movie, Chicago (the "he walked into my knife" girl), and she did little more than a kick-ball-change and a jazz square! I know it was choreographed to make the 95-year-old star look like she still had the moves, but I wasn’t fooled. Furthermore, that lady can’t really sing anymore, her life story is boring, her personality is bland, and the book doesn’t stir any emotions at all.

OK, so after the show, the big group from the chorus is just overflowing with praise for the old lady. Everyone seemed especially impressed with how much she could do at her age. This pissed me off! 72 is not that old to wear a sparkly dress and sing a few songs while waving your arms a few times (she did have very nice arms, I’ll give her that). I saw some really old ladies on Rosie O’Donnell once who were Can-Can dancers, and they could still hold one foot up by their head and hop in a circle on the other one and also do a jump into a split. Anyway, I don’t care if she was 150, if a show can’t keep my interest (which, I’ll admit, is really not that hard to do…I’ve seen Spice World at least 50 times), it’s not a good show!

Someone told me that she’s definitely going to win a Tony once it gets to New York. I don’t agree. The New York critics and audiences will tear it apart within the first week. If I’m wrong and it is a success, we will all be able to look forward to more aging stars in mediocre shows that waste the talents of incredible dancers.

Back to how I’ve been treated for not liking the show. People argue with me. I’m sorry…if I didn’t like it, I didn’t like it. You’re not going to make me see that I was being a stubborn fool and instantly change my tune. They also get very sour. "Well, she is 72!" I took a ballet class today, and the teacher asked if anyone had seen it. I said "yeah!" She was like "didn’t you just love it?" I was like "it was okay." Boom! Her face dropped, and I swear for the rest of the class, she seemed just a bit short with me. Now I’m afraid to tell people how I really felt about the show, and I think I won’t. It’s hard to say that I loved it…I might crack like Elaine did, but it was somewhat pleasant so I’ll just channel that when people ask me about it. Alright, I feel better now!

I’m sorry it’s been so long since my last post. This week has been just non-stop. And since I have to wake up at dawn to be at work, I haven’t been able to stay up late in front of the computer which is when the urge to update usually hits. Don’t worry, though! I’m adjusting the urge so that it will hit in the afternoon. Speaking of work, I just wrote a long and semi-amusing story about this mocha fiasco that happened today, but I decided that I’d better not tell work stories on a blog so I deleted it. That’s how people get fired and Lord knows I’ve never needed help getting fired. If you really want to hear it, I’ll tell you in a private e-mail or something, but until then I guess you can use your imagination.

Thanks to all of you who remembered my birthday with phone calls and e-mails! I’ve got love for all of you who didn’t, too! Lord knows I never remember birthdays either! My friends from the ski club took me to Souplantation which is a salad/soup bar restaurant like Fresh Choice or Sweet Tomatoes. It was really good. I filled up on julienned squash.

Speaking of food, I looked at some financial records the other day and realized how astronomical my food bill has been these past few months. It’s time to economize. Don’t worry, though, I’ve got a plan. I’m going to start buying my produce by the case which gives me a discount. Plus, I’m going to choose cheaper fruits. I’m sick of mango and papaya anyway. Bananas are where it’s at. I just have to get somebody to give me a ride home from the store with a case of bananas. I thought about taking a cab, but that would be like using gasoline to put out a fire.

Shout out to Roderick and David who came to San Diego last week from Chicago and New York, respectively. We had a blast chasing gay lawyers and playing Marco Polo in the hotel pool. Also, we learned that cab drivers will let you get away with a lot, but there’s one thing they won’t permit.

I don’t want this post to end. I’m having so much fun. I know, here’s a preview of my weekend. Tomorrow: day off, waiting patiently for two birthday packages, really hoping they come. Saturday: working, maybe seeing Shopgirl. Sunday: skipping the Farmer’s market…last week’s dragonfruit supplier screwed me over! Also, look forward to learning about my new, outdoor exercise program!